War for the Planet of the Apes (2017)

Slackers Gotta Slack: Let’s Play Movie Catchup!

So I’ve been bad about writing reviews this month. Because summer and shit. You know how it goes. Eating too much barbecue, doing things outside, occasionally getting super depressed thinking about how the inevitable heat death of the universe is coming for us all. The usual stuff. And hey! I managed to tackle Spider-Man: Homecoming, so that’s an accomplishment. But I still have drafts sitting open for Baby DriverWar for the Planet of the Apes, and Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets that, let’s be honest, I’m not going to finish. So I figured, screw it, let’s just drop a quick review for each into a single post. That way, we can get caught up! Continue reading “Slackers Gotta Slack: Let’s Play Movie Catchup!”

Spider-Man: Homecoming 2017

Spider-Man: Homecoming Is Quirky Teen Comedy Meets Superhero Movie

You have to appreciate a movie with a double entendre in its title. If you’ve seen Spider-Man: Homecoming, you know that the title partly references the film’s climax, in which Peter Parker attends his high school’s homecoming dance. But there’s also some cheekiness behind the name when you know that this Spider-Man movie was the first collaborative effort between Sony (which holds the rights to Marvel’s Spider-Man properties) and Marvel Studios. Because after Sony made a hot mess of The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (and got into a shit ton of debt), they made a deal with Kevin Feige (the man behind Marvel Studios’ MCU) and brought Spidey into the fold for a few films. So, in a sense, Homecoming is Spider-Man coming home…to Marvel. Continue reading “Spider-Man: Homecoming Is Quirky Teen Comedy Meets Superhero Movie”

Optimus Prime in Transformers: The Last Knight

Transformers: The Last Knight a.k.a WHAT THE F*** DID I JUST WATCH

After I saw Transformers: Age of Extinction, I didn’t think it was possible for Michael Bay to make a worse movie. Because it was bad. Painfully bad. So much so that I thought he’d straight-up drop this franchise into the ocean like Megatron and pretend it never existed. I was wrong. Continue reading “Transformers: The Last Knight a.k.a WHAT THE F*** DID I JUST WATCH”

Beauty and the Beast (2017)

Beauty and the Beast Makes Me Feel Like a Kid Again

Goddamnit, Beauty and the Beast is absolutely magical. Even though the live-action remake of the 1991 Disney animated classic is almost entirely a shot-for-shot retelling, it manages to give new life to an old tale. In the same vein as Kenneth Branagh’s 2015 film Cinderella—also part of Disney’s current live-action fairytale remake trend—this film makes tiny tweaks to the original fairytale to give it a slightly different, more mature feel. Ha! I say “mature feel” as if I wasn’t sitting there feeling like a little girl again and dreaming of princess gowns. Continue reading “Beauty and the Beast Makes Me Feel Like a Kid Again”

Kong: Skull Island (2017)

Kong: Skull Island Lays the Foundation for a Monster Franchise

Kong: Skull Island is a prequel of sorts, though probably not in the way you’re expecting. Then again, if you’ve kept up with, well, the internet, the secret’s been out for some time. Kong will face Godzilla in 2020, so Jordan Vogt-Roberts’ Kong: Skull Island is the prequel to Gareth Edwards’ Godzilla. We’re about to get a franchise of monster fights that will hopefully provide more knock-down-drag-out awesomeness than other “versus” movies we’ve seen of late. Continue reading “Kong: Skull Island Lays the Foundation for a Monster Franchise”

Tilda Swinton and Benedict Cumberbatch in Doctor Strange (2016)

Doctor Strange: A Trippy Origin Story Featuring the Internet’s Boyfriend

Doctor Strange is definitely Marvel’s “weirdest” film to date—though considering we’ve already seen two Thor films and Guardians of the Galaxy, it shouldn’t be that weird. Continue reading “Doctor Strange: A Trippy Origin Story Featuring the Internet’s Boyfriend”